EPILOGUE
TEARS
Knitted
in Secret
The
Books
Cry
of the Soul
The
Sadducees and Pharisees
The
Plea
Life
Has Not Beaten Me
Jacob
and the Angel
Love
is the Cure
HOW
I GOT THROUGH
ONE
DAY
30
Pieces of Silver
SACRIFICES
RESCUE
Moses
and Me
FLOWERS
OF THE FIELD
TO
THOSE WHOSE----------- PAIN
PRECEDED-----------MINE
Jesus
----and I
(Write----with a Sigh)
THE
LION AND THE----LAMB
His
Stripes
LIFTED
UP
THE
SPIRIT----GRIEVES
HEART
(AND SOUL)-----DISEASE
RENEWAL
WHISPERS----OF
PEACE
EPILOGUE
An anguished soul-----weeping------drops of blood
Holding on-----and holding back-----the flood
Must not-----let them flow
No one must-----ever-----know
jagged
edge-----ed pieces----of ice----one tear----at a time
A life of being----beaten----paying for----anothers' crime
Slipping out------so silently
No one----is meant----to see
They painfully-----glitter
(But I----am no----quitter)
Frozen tears of ice
Frozen tears----in ----sightless----eyes
Without a beat-----the silent heart
Waits -------for pain-----to melt-----to feel-----
What must------be felt
So that----healing can-----somehow-----start
It's safer----to appear----to be strong
When one has done it for so----long
Not wanting----another-----to see
Such sad----and lonely-----vuleranability
Can the soul----be made----to be whole
After a life----of strangling----control
Can one live again
After such-----evil----and such----men
I
must
Because
HE
is just
The dam holds fast----the----bitter past
But alone----at night----wondering
How long-----the----sting
----how long----it can last
Will it someday-----give
So she----can live
The dam----must crack
for life----to come back
I wonder if----a scientist----could----quantitate
Misery-----and hate-----feelings of------ too late
Wonder how----he'd measure----tears
of missing-----years
When no one----hears
Unspoken----fears
How many tears-----equal 31 years
Or a lifetime----of pain
Struggling----over and-----over----again
How would one measure------broken dreams
in inches----or ounces-----a mind----which-----screams
Is there a ruler----to measure----the broken and crushed
(voices forced into silence----and hushed)
The terrible------betrayal----of----trust
How to measure----a lifetime ----of brokenness
of sadness----and loneliness
yardstick----for betrayal?
Hammered yet----with another----painful----nail
Slammed ----into----the iciest----jail
Beaten----with accusations----pounding down-----as a storm----of----hail
A
measuring cup----for tears
A formula for when----nobody----hears?
A ruler----for dying by-----inches
(the depth of agony the pain that's not-----supposed----to----be)
Like salt-----rubbed into wounds----in agonizing-----pinches
Could a quart----contain
a life----of pain
8 ounces----suffice
For a lifetime----of -------blame?
No such measurements exist
No rules----on any----list
For-----such measurements----can only be taken----by the heart
And of that-----the tears----are just----a start
Eyes which shine with heartache most of the-----time
That was never HIS-----design
Eyes----brilliant with----unshed tears
and----longing
Holding fast with hope
at each----new dawning
Is there a defibrillator----for a broken heart
Can one find----the missing piece----and make----it start?
Perhaps----an atomic----clock
A measure----for----gossip----and talk
Can a doctor------- hear the heart murmur
Of a silent heart----which has died too worn-----to ever----stir?
Can a stethoscope hear-----the missing----beats
Of cruelty----which repeats-----and repeats
An emergency room----for those abused
A prescription for----those----accused?
They----need the Master's touch
For only He----can-----love------that much
No-----for
Jesus is the great physician
He stands with me-----while on my----mission
To help----and to----heal
To try-----to hope
To try----and feel
From what they----did try----to steal
To help another cope----whose heart and soul----are wounded
and----who grieve in fear
Who lost all--and watched Beveryone leave-----and---------disappear
Called to be ----salt----and light
To stand with His----power----and----might
To stand----unafraid with His----sword of justice
With this----I can never----miss
The heart----still beats----only very----slow
Where is her life----she wants-----to know
Living with----evil----which would----chill----any soul
Knowing----only that----iron----control
How blessed----and precious are they----that mourn
Enduring----the scorn
Of others----who never----suffered
From life----they've been buffered
I never listened----to those----other voices
Never let anyone----make----my choices
They can do nothing to me
For
I have ALWAYS-----been free!
Free at last, free at last
Thank God lmighty-------Free at last!
I have a future-----because I know------the----past
Nothing-----more hurtful----than rejection
lifetime----of----disconnection
I write-----and sing----and dance-----my sorrow
Each step----brings me closer----to a beautiful-----tomorrow
Iridescent wings----and a heart----which-----sings
lone I dance-----with----fairy----wand
A fighter heart------- lighter----heart----
and-with life-----a stronger----bond
There are two
Which stand between----hope-----and-----despair
(Only two----who dare)
One is invisible to----the eye
The other with unshed tears----in his-----eyes
The only----safe place----I have-----right now
Is where one lifts me up-----
It's safe----somehow no need to bow
(to anyone else)
A friend which sticketh----closer than a brother
A friend----who is like-----no other
An advocate-----who --------never-------lied
Who------is by-------my-----side
Who connected----with my----very-----soul
and cried
No need-----for----pride
He's someone----wounded----------just-----like me-----who once
had-------died
Back
to Top
TEARS
God has set aside
(Because she----cried)
A special----angel
Who weeps
As----a vigil----he----keeps
and never----sleeps
Only a few tears
they gentle my----fears
Only----a few drops----at a----time
Still paying----for those others' ----- rimes
He collects them-----one-----by----one
Until he sees----I am----done
They sit----in a crystal----vial
Because I-----was on-----trial
They are precious----in His sight
He guards me----close-----at night
One day----the tears----will subside
He's always know----why I-----have----cried
He cries----when I----cry
and signs----when I----sigh
(You shall----never die)
You may rest----as down----you----lie)
I'll one day----return those----tears----to you
You may blow them away----as bubbles
As if they----never were
So much----for those troubles
Or choose----to fling them----to the----heavens
Where they will become---joy and laughter----a million times---seventy---
seven
Back to Top
Knitted
in Secret
Even the hairs----on your head----are numbered
(Me----they thought to encumber
for I----was----just a number)
I knew you----before----you were born
You were not made----for another's -----scorn
Knitted in secret in---your mother's----womb
With my-----heavenly------delicate----loom
They tried----to----unravel----you
Who were they----to do that----to my
heavenly----creation
Angels sang when you were born
and----in my----great----elation
I (*we) gave you more gifts----than----most
(Father, Son----and Holy Ghost)
We----even-----drank----a toast!
They gave in----to evil----temptation
tried to----murder----my creation
(They thought it----elevation?)
They couldn't ruin-----my----perfection
Not even by----their-----sick-----election
For you were bought with a price
more precious----than rubies----or gold
You were made to pay
Their price----in----blood
Swept away----by their cruel----flood
At what cost-----did they----do that----toByou
They had----no clue
They WILL-----one----day
For I------have much-----to----say
Back to Top
The
Books
The first-----shall be----last
(I wonder what is in----their past)
And the last----shall be first
(I wonder----what makes them thirst)-------[for blood]
They cannot----judge ME
Only------HE
The books will be opened some day
HE will have----the----say
All people----great------and small
They can say nothing for it won't matter at all
They had so much more----than the widow's----mite
But they watched me struggle----and fight----that fight
No compassion----or----understanding
Together-----as one----all of them----banding
Souls that were dead
Listening to nothing-----I----said
Vengeance is mine-----I will----repay
I will return-----what the locusts had eaten one day
Her life----hurt so----deep
It caused me----to----weep
You threw her-----away
But she was-----mine-------to----keep
Back to Top
Cry
of the Soul
Heart----hungry----and
desperate
For----love
Needing to hear
I love you
(I'll never leave no matter----what you do)
I celebrate----who you-----are
To me----you are-----a shining star
When you're a hundred you'll be beautiful----still
(I'll never get----my fill)
No matter where you go
I will always----love you-----so
I'll rock you to sleep (safe)
you may slumber----deep
My promises----are yours-----to----keep
I'll kiss away----all tears
and soothe.....away.....all-----fears
You can begin----to----trust
I'll stay----right----here
For perfect----love
Casteth----out-----fear
No need-----
To feel ashamed----
of fear unnamed
You survived-----their blame
Took all-------their-------shame
you stood----strong
you didn't-----belong
and----took------whatever----came
I'll will never give you-----reason----to cry
I'd rather-----die
That's
all gone-----you can----move on
That's in----the by----and by
To be held-----with----strength
in----tender------arms
Feel the magic
of love----which----charms
Til death----do us----part
That's only----the----start
Back to Top
The
Sadducees and Pharisees
The
sadducees-----and-----pharisees
Still----live
Pain and suffering----to others
They----still----give
They (of old) clapped their hands----in----glee
When they saw what was happening
to me
We're so gleeful----they----are still following our----rules
They are smart-----they are----no----fools
We sneered----and laughed as they----voted
So----devoted
Ballots----with their piety----coated
Legalistically-----all-------duly----------noted
We're glad she's gone
Now we can move on
To another victim who is not----so strong
We'll cause her pain----to go----on----and on
We'll make it----last----so very----long
The victim (as in the past)----will quietly----leave
Leaving----behind their----wicked----deed
Leaving no one-----with her----to grieve
Silently----she will----bleed
It does not good----to----plead
Because we-----know how----to lead
Our minds set in concrete
We cannot hear the suffering (sheep)-----bleat
Our cruelty----is----complete
No needs-----of hers we'll ever-----meet
For it----knows----no----bounds
just----pounds-----and----pounds
Drowning out----all other----sounds
We have a----righteousness----and legal----grounds
Soul we'll------steal
We cannot-----feel
(While here)-----She cannot----heal
We never knew-----how to-----be-----real
The rules------are all
We cast----our (evil)-----pall
To watch----and wait
and see
Another
Fall
Back
to Top
The
Plea
Who
will----love me
The lonely------heart----cries out
If it only----could
It would scream----and----shout
ll others drowning----out
But that is not----what it is----about
For there is no substitute-----for----love
Who knows better-----than God----above
Who will love me
They cry out wordlessly
So----endlessly
Blinded eyes------which----cannot-----see
Living in such----abject-----misery
In all----humanity
There must be one
Who connects
To me
But I------am not blind
And I can------see
Others'-----sad----reverie
There is one ----who loves me
With all joy----and----purity
For it is easier----for a camel-----
(My life tried to-----trammel)
To pass through----the eye----of a needle
They sought----to make me beg----and wheedle
They had----to----stop
Because I would not-----be-----bought
No price was enough
To swallow-----that----stuff
They sought----
To punish----me
Who will love----me in all-----humanity
That is why
I wait
So
Patiently
Back to Top
Life
Has Not Beaten Me
Life has----not beaten----me
(Because I have always----been able----to see)
The rainbow-----
-------preceding-----me
I speak my mind
I say it----kind
They tried to destroy
Take away my joy
My mind----is no toy
I could never----be coy
Straight-forward I speak
I guess (sometimes) it's not----chic
To say what you think
Without ever needing----to blink
Perhaps I burst a bubble
Bringing up----some kind of trouble
Let's fix it
and not hide it
Get yourself----inside it
Bring it out
Banish doubt
Let your yea be yea
and your nay----be nay
For all thoughts----and intents of the heart
----will be known one day
Quench not-----the spirit
They----couldn't even----hear it
Swear not on the heavens
Or on the earth-----for the earth is my----footstool
To think anything----else
Is to play----the fool
Be honest and straight
I----wait
Back
to Top
Jacob
and the Angel
Jacob----wrestled----with the angel
All night long
I've wrestled----with my life
All-----life----long
For him there came----the morning
My morning will be-----when I have nothing
left-----of----mourning
He triumphed----over the angel and won
I've triumphed----over life----
Where there seems----to be-----no sun
Even when everyone leaves
I'm still----not----done
As sure----as night follows----the day
I still have----something----to say
Even when I am dead
someone may remember----what I----have said
But NOW----I LIVE
Trying----to give
They needed----to fight----her
(My mother wrote that----letter
they should----have thought----better)
and remembered-------I----was
----someone's----daughter
My mother said----- be kind
She's guilty------that's what-----we----find
I lift my eyes----unto----the----hills
You'd think-----they'd had----their fill {of crucifixion}
From whence----cometh my help
(My help----cometh----from the Lord)
She was never----made-----for a----prison
For
I've made her-----unique
She is----to----speak
She won't be meek
She will speak the truth
Like the Biblical-----Ruth
Your people----shall be
My people
And your God My God
Whose God do they----serve
What gall----what----nerve
I serve a different God
The truth has set-----me------free
Back to Top
Love
is the Cure
All that----matters-----is love
The Holy Spirit----appears----as----a dove
The----here and now-----is all----we have
Grasp it------and don't let----go
Each new day----becomes----a gift
A chance-----to others----lift
A chance to say
You're here----today
Don't let----a moment----pass
For life is like----a -----class
You must learn
Everyone----has-----that yearn
To -----connect
They want----and expect
What have----you-----done or said today
To help----another----on their way
Is there sympathy or empathy
That anyone----can see
Use it----before
They----slip out----
into----all
Eternity
Back
to Top
HOW
I GOT THROUGH
If not for my faith-----and sense of humor
(No fooling)
I'd be sitting----in a corner----drooling
A friend once said:
You should----be dead
and
It's a wonder you have a----sense----of self
But----I have----a lot of me----left
Instead of one----guardian angel----I----have four
One in front (of me), one behind, one
who stays by my side
and----one
who stands-----by----my heart's------door
Others (angels) show up at just the moment----I need----them
They are called----friends------those precious gems
Some come right----out of the blue
They stand with me----and know----what to ----do
Some show up----as strangers
Watching over-----so many----dangers
All invisible----to me
But my spirit----senses------and----sees
Most people----only have one
Mine-----have just----begun!
I keep them working so very hard
(they rarely have time)
To practice----they harps
They have flown----to my aid----so many times
Their halos----need-----a----shine
They've decided----that I----am a full-time----job
They say: Sometimes she doesn't know----she needs us sometimes
we think----she's ----a bit----of a----snob
Fools----rush in (me?)
But angels-----see
Even though----they fear to----tread
They know when I need help----don't want me----dead
Their wings----have barely----cooled off----from a----mission
Sometimes----we need to confer with the great----physician
But we'll always----be there
God gave us that job-----HE holds her----dear
With us always with her-----she has nothing to-----fear
Am
I----coming together-----or----flying----apart
Both an ending----and----a----start?
Back
to Top
ONE
DAY
One
day-----God ----will have his----reckoning
He'll have his----say
(of those people)
He will----be----beckoning
My word----was to be-----used
(not abused)
As salt----and light----unto your path
You used it like----an-----acid----bath
A blood bath (hers)
She was to be treated-----in a gentle----manner
NOT----beaten----with a sledge-----hammer
An ice-pick
To make her-----heart-sick
I was supposed to be----your----mirror
You wouldn't even-----hear-----her
I couldn't----have made it----clearer
She needed to be-----protected
That is what----I------expected
I watched
in----horror--------She----kept------her------honor
As you-----used----your poison----pens
To----cause pain----to one of my own-------again
To---- rape ----her-----again
That leader said I need to make an example of you
He forgot----MY example-----what evil-----they------do
All down-home----and tribal----like
She'd been----pounded-----but still----had----fight
Rested----in my----might
Of ignorance----and----fear
It's all-------found--------here
They think they have added a jewel to their----crowns
----Clowns
I forgave----the thief----on the cross
They must----punish----at----any----cost
This day shalt thou be with me----in-----paradise
Their veins----were----cold------as----ice
Back
to Top
30
Pieces of Silver
30 pieces-----of silver that's all----it took
For Judas----to----betray
How cheaply------HE----was----sold
How cheaply-----I was-----told
100 plus----ballots
To forsake me----that day
------and on----my BIRTHDAY??!!
Judas----hung----himself
So-------did-----they
(They'll know it----one----day
When time----slips-----away)
Jesus' followers----said
Is it I, Lord? Is it----I?
( All the while knowing he was----to----die)
The followers of one man----didn't ----even----ask
Legallistically----wentBstraight-----to their----task
I ----died----too
Like-----Jesus-----I also-----knew
What horrifying betrayal
Beyond----the----pale
No one----can believe----my tale
Betrayal----on such----a ----large----scale
They were brutal with HIM----brutal------with----me
While HE-----hung-----on that----tree
I hung there---------too-----for all-----to----see
The veil-----was rent------in----two
They rent----my mind what more-----evil could they do
He was buried-----and-----resurrected
They never-----even----suspected
I would -----be---------too!
The---- Assassins
Assassins------of the-----soul
Delighted----at their goal
Certainly----not to----heal ----me
Help----me----restore-----me
Make me-----whole
Assassins----of----love and----peace
(Nothing to set----a mind----at ease)
All chaos----is supposed----to----cease
For I----have come----to bring----a----sword
No love----could they----begin----to----afford
Putting on the whole armor of God
I was wearing it----when ----they-----gave----the nod
They let their arrows----fly
They didn't pierce
They did----fly----fierce
They were----crying-----My----eyes were dry
I wonder----if-----they wonderred-----why
The fiery----darts
In------icy----hearts
Of the----wicked
Souls -----better----off dead
So you may----stand
(No helping hand)
In that----day they came at me
as a----painful----shower
But---------I----was the
one----who had-----the------power
Back to Top
SACRIFICES
They tore-----my heart out
(It was painful----but----I didn't----cry out)
While it was----still----beating
Like the Aztecs----of old
Ancient temples----of gold
It was the sacrifice
They did----slice----and----cut
They ripped out----a beating----heart
----suffering----heart
Because----theirs----had stopped-----will theirs
----ever------start?
My heart lay----beating-----bleeding
It would----have done no good to have been pleading
I was a sacrifice
What cruelty----and----device
Jesus said I had already paid the price
Now I've had to----think----twice
I already died for her
Why did she----have----to die
again
for--------you?!
That was NOT-----ME----but----YOU
I wonder----what god
You sacrificed-------her
to
They plucked the hairs out of my beard
The pain in her mind you----seared
It was-----as she feared
She had to----die
and didn't----even----know----why
They threw----a spear into----my side
You made her want to----hide
From which----blood----and water----flowed
Such misery----and grief----her mind----overflowed
What kind----of love----is this-------you-----showed?!
They put a sponge----with hyssop and wine
To my mouth----but I did not----drink
You laid----heavy burdens
on one----of mine
Stones
So she
would-----sink
The only thing----that----sank was----her heart
In doing so----you tore----her----mind----apart
They ----platted----a crown of thorns----upon my head
You made her wish----that she were dead
You did not listen to what-----I ----said
My head----lowered to----my----chest
She was (is)-----one of my----best
She withstood----your----test
Had nothing-----to----confess
She cried out to me----
Please let this cup----pass----from me
Not my will----but thine
I spoke to her gently----and gave her my sign
(My love----and peace-----divine)
I died----gave up----the----ghost
I sent to her-----not one angel
But------a-----host
Why stand ye here gazing into----the sky
For----I really----didn't ever die
The stone was rolled away
Her stone----was -----------you
What did----you-----do!
I brought her back
She saw----your----lack
I live----within----her----heart
Your blindness
Didn't let you ----see
That------part
Victory's Arms
Held tight----in victory's arms
While the soul----all the while
Listened----to the voice----which charms
(I was safe from all their harms)
He knew what I would have to go through
He knew what I would----need----to do
The tempest----raged
(As on his spirit I leaned)
As a lion caged
I was tossed----to and fro
He was faithful didn't let me go
I was in the hollow----of his hand
Still standing----as on dry land
Yes----safe----in victory's arms
Safe----from their harm
He said thy faith has made thee whole
Over you----they have no control
I tapped the rock----waited with a sigh
Water came pouring out
and so
did
I
Back
to Top
RESCUE
I stood near-----the ocean----door
He said-----you----are alone----no more
I could not see----his footprints beside me
I wondered----where He was
and----how----He would guide me
I gazed at the seamless----sand
(It seemed too much to bear)
I couldn't see Him anywhere)
He reached out----and took my hand
I felt His warmth----infuse----my soul
He said----I----am in control
I see your pain and abuse has taken its toll
But I have made thee whole
They are laying heavy burdens on one of mine
But you still stand----and shine
Refuse-----to be blind
I spoke the truth they hatedBme
You spoke the truth they refused to see
One day in Paradise
Scales shall fall from blinded eyes
For the time is coming when the Son of Man
Shall appear
Until that time I hold you dear
Even though you were much sinned against
I----was your constant----your divine----defense
Endure Endure-----Endure
For you can know-----for----sure
I came to seek and save that which was lost
It seemed those others----have strayed
You braved the pain endured----the blame
and
like Me
You were the only one----who knew-----
the cost
Still holding my hand----
(He stretched out his arm)
Stay with Me----for I
am in----command
He said: Even the wind and waves obey me
Watch----and you----will see
The storm seemed to engulf me
I heard his voice so quietly
I'll calm your spirit------as I calm-----the sea
And in doing so-----
HE
Rescued----------me
Back to Top
Moses
and Me
tisket-----a-----tasket
Moses----in a----basket
I wonder what was in their------bailiwick
That made them----sick
Pushed out into the reeds
I was pushed out----as if I had----no needs
Discovered by Pharoh's daughter
Compassion----had----taught her
To discover-----the hidden
They could only see my sin
Picked up and held in tender arms
Taken with----Moses' baby charms
I was picked up----and----thrown
If they had only----known
the power----of God's----love
Instead of that----deadly-----shove
Raised in the Pharoh's----court
Me----they tried----to abort
Given the best of everything
They----gave me----a slap and a sting
The crocodiles had no chance
They in their--------evil------dance
God had a plan
Theirs----could only----damn
He was innocent------and so-----was I
They voted me-----to-----die
Instead----I was rescued by----God
He gave an angel----the nod
He reached me in his-----holy----might
He reached me in that-----evil----night
They-----couldn't reach me-----surrounded-----by------His
shining light
I will give the angels----watchBcare----over you
You have done----what you----had to do
I was/am surrounded by his light
Like Moses always in his----sight
Back to Top
FLOWERS
OF THE FIELD
Flowers----wither and die
But not------I
Not enough tears in the universe to match my cry
Truth----could not----flower there
It withered and fled
Leaving----its----fields naked and bare
I told the truth----but it was not----received
Had only----just----one
Heard my soul
But no one dared no one----believed
The wind listeth where it will
Everyone there----just------standing----still
It passeth away----and is heard from----no more
Just like the sad people----who had left-----before
As at Pentecost
Not knowing how----lost
The wind----needs to sweep and roar in that place
They need to look up----and see His----face
They need to be----renewed
Instead of on those----pews-----quietly----glued
Go ye therefore----into----all the world
Wonder what is their----world
Who have you helped----today
Whose suffering have you taken-----away
Or is it just enough to just sit-----and pray
Can you name------anyone-----
Who------upon-----seeing----you
Sees------God's---------son?
Whose life did you----Cease
Who is it----you----please
Did you allow----a stranger in
Or shrink back because they----might have sin
If you have done it to the least of these
(But first you must be able-----to see)
To pray without ceasing
doesn't mean
being----on your-----knees
Did you----give me----a drink?
No----you had to think
Did you feed me?
No-----you wanted----to see
What others wanted to do----to me
Did you care enough----to ask me----anything at all?!
On Christ's name----that casts----a------pall
Did you love me?
No----you put yourselves
Above----me
These----are questions----you should----answer
souls
Dying
of spiritual------cancer
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TO
THOSE WHOSE----------- PAIN
PRECEDED-----------MINE
Living-----and-------Leaving----in
such----sad----and hopeless------silence
Emotional------anguish----mental-----violence
Leaving----in such----pain
NEVER to be------- heard from------ever-------again
No help-----is there----to----be found
Deafening----silence-----so----profound
Nothing to be----found there
Nothing----but lonely----despair
Be transparent-----your life to share
Watch out!
If you do-----judgement will come
Your life----they----will------shun
We'll lay----your life----bare
Before-------others-----also----who
do----------not------care
Intents-----of
the Heart
He knows----the thoughts
and intents-----of the heart
He knows what we will say
Even before----we do start
Jesus---- never turned on one of his own
This you--------should have known
He turned on thieves
He saw what you did
and grieves
He overturned tables of moneychangers
He didn't think that you-----
would be one of his----dangers
He confronted-----hypocrites
All of my life----taking cruel hits
I never expected
My church----family
To turn----on me
My unsaved friends
Where there for me
Where----were you?!
I tried to withdraw my membership quietly
That was not to be
He said I have to make an example of you!
And
If people see you in the choir they
Will think it's okay (?!)
To get a divorce
Divorce----was lots of fun----of course
I waited and struggled for 31 years!
million tears
They waited for more than a year
He
said this is not about divorce
The shock of that statement
Through my mind-----did course
Right from the beginning----it was
My mind was on playback-----and pause
To the things he said
I felt shock while that lie----bled
I went to him and the pastor before him
For help
and found----none
I naively thought----they would do their jobs
But when----it was done
Realized----they knew nothing
My mind awakened to a new dawning
Like lying in a ditch
All broken and bleeding
My heart crying out
and silently-----bleeding
One day----Jesus will be saying
She bled where were you
Out somewhere----playing?
You tortured my sheep
For 18 months she suffered
and could not-----sleep
Rules----and legalism
Abound----there
You didn't care
I wonder how you will----feel
When before me----she will bow
I'll place my healing hand
On her----brow
and say..............
You survived a lifetime of misery
Hoping----someone----might help
and----see
But no one cared
Except your heavenly----father
--------Me
We
wept at what----was done
to you
Now----you are new
Vengeance is mine I will repay
I have waited for this very----day
She forgave you----already
and bore it rock-steady
We have no ballots----in----heaven
You were not salt----but----only----leaven
We have no----membership rules----to sign
Only my purest light
and love----divine
We have no----church offices----or meetings
Because the church----could not
hear her pleadings
But I-------did
I am the God----who sees----all
Was right with her when on me----she did call
Her I gently----led
To where----she is now
So she can ask you-------
Why
and
HOW
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Jesus
----and I
(Write----with a Sigh)
Jesus------speaks----to me
(I want you to) write-----holy purest poetry
It is so others----can see
His mind-----his----purity
He speaks to me so tenderly
That I write----so effortlessly
It is for healing today
For others
Who feel their lives
Slowly slipping-----away
I have sent my holy spirit
To live within you
So you can write what I
----need you to
My word----is not only found
in my book
The words----I breathe in her
are there if you will Bonly----look
I've bound her in my----spirit
I'd like to bind her poems
in a book of purest------gold
Release her mind
From everything she's experienced
Take her out----of that cold
If I am able to lead
You can read
Some of the words
Commence to bleed
She feels me near
I whisper tender words
Upon her ear
You can find----healing----there
Hear the glorious sounds
of joy-bells----pealing
The pain of humanity
quietly easing
I help----her write
I take----such----delight
She stands----within----my might
nd in----my holy----light
I told her I would never leave her nor
forsake her
Although----many tried
To destroy----and cruelly break her
I made her in part
Out of tempered----steel
And yet----she is able to feel
The suffering----of others
The words----are mine
But----also----hers
Another wounded soul
wakes----and------stirs
To know that what
we are----saying
Can lighten a burden
To long-----a-laying
That is why----we are doing this
----gift----from us
Our----healing
kiss
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THE
LION AND THE----LAMB
.......and the lion----shall----lay down
with the lamb
(They what a sham)
They shall----study war----no more
They went to war
Tried me----sore
He my savior
His love----I----savor
Their flavor----was ugly-----and bit
Their faith no movement
only----to judge----and just----sit
Souls so dark
They bite and bark
Knowing only----how to take
In Jesus' name
They played----a sick game
For Jesus'----sake
Now I lay me down to sleep
With scattered-----and fearful----bleating----sheep
Those others----who left
Feeling-----bereft
-----of love----and warmth----and light
They couldn't stand up to all of that
and----fight
They were so worn out
and so----afraid
While in silence----prayed
In cold hearts----some stayed
The sun----is melting----now
For I will----never----bow
to hypocrites
Who would tear----a soul
Into----painful
jagged
bits
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His
Stripes
By his stripes----we are----healed
People----of their stripe
Are----revealed
With anguish----of mind
I readied----and----steeled
Against----people blind
How could they
Be----Jesus'-----kind
When nothing of compassion----they could find
I am justified by grace
See it----in my face
That memory cannot erase
Mouths full of guile
That ----even-----did smile
Cruelty upon cruelty on me
They----did pile
Thinking they had done----Jesus' work
There was one----who even----did smirk
Satan----must haveBsmiled
They performed his work----all
blind----and----beguiled
Hang her high----and watch----her die
Satan said----that wasn't God
But----------------
I!
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LIFTED
UP
He said----if I be lifted up
I'll draw all----men to me
I was a part----of your
family
Feet that are swift to shed----blood
Oh----what a river
How it rained
What a----flood
All so----civilized
Some with punishment----and judgement
in their eyes
He is the savior
He didn't save----me
For this!
That Judas' kiss
They----didn't hesitate
and didn't
miss
There must be a reason----for a lifetime of pain
They made it for loss----but it was only----gain
The reason----to help others
Jesus died for me
They made him die ----again
for all to see
What----hollow-----victory
He said----if you drink of my----living water
You will never----thirst
and I never have
He's been tending my wounds
with----heavenly----salve
If he died for me
Why-----did I have to ----die
For them----to----see
He asked way back when
Who do you say that I am
Sir, I perceive thou art a prophet
They said-----you're in sin----you have to----admit
I was sinned----against
No help-----did I
receive
The silence----deafening
Just
leave
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THE
SPIRIT----GRIEVES
Do not----grieve----the spirit
You did------he had to ----see
and----hear----it
I'd----rather
live his word
Than----read it
Study to show thyself-----approved
(Ignorance was all-----they----proved)
Once you have studied it
You know it
Then------live-----it
For----ignorance
Is not----bliss
The betrayal----
of that----- kiss
Knowledge----is the power
How you live----each------hour
Life----will soon----be past
What have you done
For Christ
That----will last
Every----second----is closer----to the time
When you will be----beckoned
For every man----will give----an----account
An assault on her----you proceeded-----to----mount
You will say
We thought----we were doing your------will
HE-----will ----say
Those who----belong to me
I -------------NEVER REJECT
I----------- NEVER-----------
KILL
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HEART
(AND SOUL)-----DISEASE
They had congestive----heart disease
But their minds were at----ease
The----oscilloscope measured a straight line
My heart----kept right on----beating
impulses triggered----by Jesus divine
The doctor----just shook his head
Said-----yes, they-----are dead
How is it they still walk
How is it----they----still talk
(The Bible says: The dead know nothing)
no comment
The irony is that she has the strongest heart
we have----ever----seen
And somehow----she lives
Even though they thought to kill her
She did----endure
Instruments of torture
They thought----s----sure
Doing God's----will
But those hearts----were----standing still
The doctors were amazed
She----didn't seem----fazed
Even though such punishment
She took
By those dead hearts
She was----forsook
160 arrows pierced her
heart
She pulled them----out
one----by----one
With the help----of God's-----only----son
And when----she was----done
She still stood----in the light
In----everyone's-----sight
No darkness----surrounded----her
No one----could----bind her
She was alone but still----in that sun
The doctors
pronounced---------them-------dead
God----pronounced---------her
LIVE
-----in ME-----
He-------said!
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RENEWAL
I can sense-----a
renewing of----my----spirit
I can taste it-----feel it
-----see it------hear it
The long dark night
To be replaced by-----blinding----light
Jesus----lover----of my soul
Speaks----and makes----me well----and whole
I can see----his face
He's working----to erase
What they----did to----me
So----I-----may see
Joy------coming----in the morning
So----I can lift up my voice-----singing
Eternal praise----so He-----can know
HE-------has made it-----so!
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WHISPERS----OF
PEACE
He----whispers------peace-----be still
for
I------am with you-----still
and
I-----have promises-----to----fulfill
I hear each heartache
I am here your pain----to take
I hear the soul's quiet moan
Yearning to go home
To rest----and peace
sadness to----release
I was born----to die
But
You were born-----to----fly
And fly----you will
I watch you----still
Foolish little heart
This is just----the start
Of a life----you never had
Of a life-----inwardly----sad
As you stand upon----the precipice
Close your eyes----and make my------wish
For life----and love----and happiness
If you can hope----and wish for it----to be
Then I----will stand so close----to thee
You will smile
Knowing I've been with you
Every step----of every----mile
I will heal you
As
Only----I-----know ----how to do
I see the sparrow fall
I always----hear you
when----you call
Let me pick you up and carry you for----awhile
Turn those tears----into----a song
Into----a smile
It won't be long
You'll sing your----song
I'll turn your swords
Into----plowshares
I'll breath new life into----you
To lessen all your cares
Rest your head
Think
on what I've----said
To now where I have gently led
----you----into light
and out----of fright
I've never----let you----go
For
You-----have seeds----to----sow
life----to grow
You'll----be my flower
Reaching towards----the sun (son)
Living with----and under
My-----holy-----power
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